While we wait....and wait a little more....

Mishmash from today so far...

1.  SLEEP - ahhhh...love it!  We actually went to bed last night about 9pm here and slept until NOON!  Felt great!

2.  Gifts - I spent the early afternoon unpacking and preparing gifts for the folks who have cared for V here, as well as for those who are helping us with travel, documents, etc.  And there are lots of treats for the kiddos who are at V's orphanage too - thanks for those who sent them.  Might need a sleigh soon :)

                                                                             

3.  Keys - Huh, so I didn't know that you can't open our apartment door from the INSIDE without the key.  Now I do!  Hubby went on an errand with our neighbor and I hear someone at the door...speaking Latvian.  Guess I'll let them in???  Ummm, no I won't - door won't unlock.  ACK!  They keep saying, "Open door?"  I keep saying, "No key."  Finally, the guy manages to ask if it is okay if they open the door.  Sure, why not?  In comes a lady from the apartment building office and a TV guy.  Not sure why they are here, but we'll go with it.  He did whatever and left.  Big lesson learned for me - go with Bryan or keep the key!

4.  Snow - I look out the window and see snow!  Yippee!!  Not a lot, but since we had hardly any in DC this winter, this is a beautiful bonus to our first full day in Latvia.

4.  Bank cards - Second lesson of the day - you should know your PIN for your bank card.  You see, I never use it at home, so when the machine here wants the pin, huh, it will not cooperate since I don't know it. And the company wants me to stop at a nearby office to get the pin. Welllll, that is a several hour plane ride away.  Also learned to get sim card replacement info for the Latvian phone ASAP because we now have no credits remaining so that the lawyer can reach us.  So much to learn....

5. Visit with Vitaly - He was so excited, we were so excited!  We arrived and the lawyer chatted with the workers, getting a frowny face that didn't thrill me.  Apparently there was a misunderstanding and V is still a few hours away at the other school/orphanage instead of arriving here today as she expected.  Bottom line - no visit today :(  Boo!  Patience, patience.  We can wait another day.  So can he.  Just disappointing.

6.  Double Coffee - The lawyer (LOVE her) suggests that Bryan and I enjoy the extra hours without kids, so we went for phone credits at the local Narvesson (like 7-11). Big excitement! Followed that up with a late meal at the Double Coffee nearby.  Back to the apartment now, hoping to Skype with the boys back home.

7.  Especially for Julia - One of my fellow Latvian/American adoptive mommas has been teaching me so much.  Seeing the simple things around me in new ways, mostly.  Anyway, this pic is for you Julia.  Much to learn still, but here were my thoughts:

     *Wonder how one "upgrades" a snack - are they referring to adding in a beer like on the picture?  Followed quickly by wondering why they are serving free wine on the plane.  Losing big bucks that way, I'd think.

       *The cold noodle package with veggies of some sort and a Thai type of sauce was interesting.  I mainly wondered if the people on the back had inspired this recipe?  If not, what had they done to earn such an honored place on the tray tables of so many.

        *The cherry shake one was a favorite.  Okay, so I really just wanted the cherry shake!  BUT, when I saw this ad for donating to plant a tree, figured that would make a great excuse for it.  Bonus :)

That is about it for today - many new things and people, blessings everywhere!

Joy and peace to each of you,

Sue 

                                                                                   

Loving Latvia - Day 1

Our "home" for two weeks 

Settling in and ready for bed, but wanted to post a bit first as I promised to share some of the journey with friends and family as able.  

First, a friend that we've known for awhile drove us to the airport in DC.  Then, a new friend picked us up at the airport in Riga.  Another adopting family who is staying in our building invited us for a very yummy meal.  That is how this adoption has gone - so many people brought together around giving one child a home and family.  

A few memorable moments:

** Lufthansa's video of Flyrobics - hilarious attempt to get us to exercise in a very tiny space similar to a sardine tin.  No way we could have done those without hurting someone!  Points for creativity though :)

**Sue's shopping list - get sandals and capris for the plane ride home.  May be cold still in Latvia, but for someone that gets hot flashes, those planes are like ovens - whew!

**Inese found a wonderful apartment for us at a very reasonable price - another new friend!

Here are a few photos!  Families coming behind us, may want to check it out!

**Already seeing some very unique architecture on these buildings - the blue/white one is eye-catching.

**Get to visit with V tomorrow!  Got to rest up :)

   

Love to all, Sue and Bryan 

I am MAD!!!! Warning: a tad long so don't read if you are in a hurry....

I am MAD, ANGRY, FRUSTRATED, TICKED, fill in your favorite synonym - you get the idea!!!!

ooh - is this what i look like when the 4th graders are misbehaving?  scaryish....and tired looking, but focus on the MAD part!!!

Why???

At whom/what???

So???

Well, I've learned over the years that when I get really angry and frustrated, it is helpful to dig around and find out a little more info because just being MAD doesn't do much other than to make me unpleasant to be with and to increase my blood pressure.  I am definitely MAD, so I'm sharing what I've discovered about it here....

??Why?? Bottom line - there are wonderful children all over the world who are without families to love and care for them.  Expanded version - there are many problems in our world but how do we as a people allow the youngest and most vulnerable to continue in this state?  How can there not be loving homes for these children who have already suffered so much?

??At whom/what?? This part took me weeks and I don't think I'm done yet.  Once I knew what was bothering me, I thought about who and/or what was "causing" it.  Seven possible "culprits" have come to mind.

   1.  THE ORPHANS - Easy - no way!  They wouldn't ever ask to be in this position.

   2.  THE BIRTH PARENTS - Uhmmm...no. Not one parent I know is perfect.  We all have issues - some 

        of them just aren't illegal, some aren't caught, and some mostly harm ourselves.  I'm glad that these 

        parents brought life to these awesome kids.  I wish that the sad and ugly times hadn't happened, but 

        anger at the birth parents will be unproductive.  I don't know the whole story anyway. 

   3.  ORPHANAGES OR COUNTRIES - Nah.  They have huge challenges with so many to care for.  

        Covering necessities like food and shelter are to be expected, but an institution or government isn't 

        capable of providing a loving family.  Some could do a better job or make adoptions easier maybe.  But 

        again, anger at them?  Don't think they'll bat an eye at me...and nothing will change.

   4.  "THE SYSTEM" - Well...this one I still struggle with a lot!  Some things just make no stinking sense!!!  

        Mini-example - 3 sets of fingerprints from 3 different places?  Can't we share?  Hundreds of forms and

        multiple certifications?  More money than many families make in a whole year?  What???  Rules serve a 

        purpose but - come on.  Some need to be overhauled!  AND, my frustration isn't going to change them.

   5.  FAMILIES OF THE WORLD - Think I'm less mad and more confused here.  Where are the families 

        for these kids?  I just don't get it?  There are plenty of homes with extra beds.  There are savings 

        accounts that are saving for what - something more important that a desperately needy child??  BUT, I 

        don't know hearts and purposes.  It is not my job to judge.  Waaaayyy beyond me to change or open

        hearts.  So, not mad, but confusion is still there.

  6.  CHURCH/CHRISTIANS - Not talking any specific Christian person or individual church, more the 

       overall groups.  Lots of things are difficult to agree on in the Bible and life of Jesus.  But not kids.  He

       loved them and certainly focused on those who were in need.  However, there are others who are

       needy, so perhaps churches and Christians are working in those areas too, so not my call to put a certain 

       kind of need over others.  Just have to wonder if some of our time and resources are being best used??

  7.  GOD - Never did feel anger toward God in this.  Why?  Because I believe with all of my heart that He 

       wants each child cherished and loved and in a family.  Love isn't forced though.  Someone has to be

       willing.  So, don't think that He is the problem.  Well, I'm pretty much out of people to blame!!!  That 

       leads me to....

??So?? Still angry and I've got to do something with that.  Here are the ways that I've found to vent some of it in ways that actually help the very thing that makes me so mad:

   1.  Live the solution!  I dare not preach what I won't live.  I am adopting!

   2.  Encourage others who are living the solution - support those who are adopting with $ and prayer 

        and a break now and then; kind words; celebrations.

   3.  Help as many children as my family possibly can.  We can't help all, but how many CAN we help? 

        Hmmmm.....intend to find out :)

   4.  Tell our/their stories to whoever is willing to listen.  Maybe some really don't know.  Now they will!

Told you this was a long one!  Wonder if anyone actually reads these?  Well, it is therapeutic for me so guess it doesn't really matter.

Final thought:  I have been reading in the books of the prophets of the Bible recently.  They were folks who God gave special and important messages to.  There is a fellow there named Ezekiel.  This guy got to ACT OUT messages - for example, at one point his word pictures included him lying on his side for days, months, over a year to make a point.  He made soup to illustrate another.  Got me wondering - since I do believe that God asks us to share His love through our lives, isn't adopting just another beautiful word picture?  Isn't it another way of showing who He is and what we might be missing and where we need to wake up and pay attention to something more important than we understand?  Well, I know that I can't live with being mad and having nowhere to funnel that.  Living in a way that makes a real change in the problem and illustrates the love of the God I serve & love through adoption - THAT is anger management for me, my friends!  

Off to Latvia to do just that - 3 days and counting!

Surprise!!!

So, as I was writing the earlier post, guess what the crew that I work with was doing??  Gathering to throw a surprise "baby shower" for me!!  Seriously!  I just got back from what I thought was a nice little lunch with a couple of friends that turned out to be a party with tons of yummy food, hugs and stories with fellow teachers,  and lots of sweet gifts to welcome our boy home.  You gals (and guys) are the best!  I imagine that Vitaly is feeling the love from here even now :)

AANNNDDDD... my hubby (who knew about the surprise) cleaned the bathroom while I was gone!  Doesn't get much better here!!!!

Amy and Alina

Peggy, Barb, Dawn

Roberta and Jen

Jen and Katie

Me with Brooke and Vitaly's new Lego alarm clock!

Yummmmm!!!

Andrew is not intimidated by a few women at a baby shower :)  Mina and Rachel in the background.
Not pictured - lots of friends who sent cards, gifts, greetings - and some who left before we remembered to break out the camera!!

2nd Honeymoon Baby

Some of you know that last June was our 20th wedding anniversary.  Well, Bryan and I had planned a getaway to celebrate - it fell through.  So, we decided to use the money to start our third decade together in a very adventurous and life-giving way!  We signed up to host an orphan from Latvia for the summer - a teenager none-the-less.  A perfect way to begin year 21!

As a result of our "2nd honeymoon" adventure, there is a young man who is about to become a permanent member of our family.  Interestingly enough, I've heard others relate the adoption process to pregnancy and giving birth biologically.  Maybe not all relate to that, but we certainly can.  Here are a few similarities:

1.  From the date we met Vitaly at the airport to the date that the court will say that he can come home to America?  You may have guessed approximately - 9 months and 1 day.  God's timing can be pretty awesome :)

2.  Early on we weren't sure that this adoption was going to happen - more than once.  Reminds me of the child we lost to miscarriage between N and A.  Also, when I was on bed rest with J.  Very helpless feeling....

3.  Many comments about how to adopt, whether to adopt, where to adopt from, how to parent, which doctors to see/not see..... reminders of all of the helpful advice given, especially with our first-born :)

4.  Exhaustion!  The further into every pregnancy, the more wiped out I got.  Bringing life has a cost.  Well, that is the case here too.  Feel like I'm about done physically, emotionally, and spiritually now - just like with each of our others.  And I remember that birth didn't bring rest either :)  Guessing that will be the same.  The fun and craziness is just beginning.

5. Meds and C-Sections - Our first three each had their own stories, but all resulted in a significant amount of help from doctors, nurses, meds, and equipment in order to be born safely.  I'm thinking that our super speedy January to March delivery process was a bit like a shot of Pitocin (do they still use that? been a few years....)  And now I just want this child to be delivered!  Someone just tell me when it is over :)  Good ole Dr. Lim delivered the other 3.  Thinking that Dr. Daina (aka our Latvian lawyer who is amazing) is in charge of this one.

6.  Mom and the in-laws cared for the existing kiddos while we went to the hospital for each new baby.  Guess who is in charge this time around?  Yep, the same!  In-laws first, then Mom comes (after a round of chemo no less) to keep things running smoothly.

7.  Friends celebrated each child and friends are celebrating Vitaly too.  If someone isn't celebrating with us, gotta wonder why.

8.  Gifts were given to all of our children to welcome them and celebrate new life!  The same has happened for Vitaly.  We are amazed by the generosity of friends, new and old, who are excited about the addition to our family.

So, in just a few days, our we will be learning to function with one more member.  Every time we have added a child, things have been wild and wacky for awhile as we adjust to one another and learn to love and live differently.  I expect that this time will be the same.

Can only wonder what our 30th wedding anniversary celebration might bring :)  Anyone want to celebrate in a similar way?  There are SO many kids just waiting ... see www.newhorizonsforchildren.org or google adoption for other options.

Math and Mites

Celebrating today!  So, this is a picture of all of those who have helped to bring Vitaly home in any way so far!  It hangs by his bed to remind him that sooooo many people came together to help him.  The puzzle is orange - his favorite color.  Each piece names a person or business involved in getting him home. We add on every time a new helper comes along.  Those are the folks I want to celebrate today!

Today's blog post is called "Math and Mites" for a reason.  See if you can figure out why....

Celebrating The Widow!  She has given far beyond anyone else on this puzzle.  Interesting. Because she has probably "less" than anyone else there.  Ever heard of the widow's mite?  How does one come to giving away so very much when having what others would see as "just enough"?  Hmmmmm.....

Celebrating Adoptive Families!  So, a huge percent of the puzzle pieces carry names that represent other adoptive families - folks who are in the middle of gathering their own thousands to bring home a child or more.  Some who have just completed adoptions costing 5 digits.  How does that make sense?  Ever heard of the boy with the loaves and fish?  He gave what he had and everyone ended up with enough.  Hmmmmmm......

Celebrating Friends and Family!  We have had people give time, airline miles, money, bingo-calling and coordinating skills, and paypal account borrowing - among other things!  These are just regular folk who want to help.  Good friends, old friends, new friends, teacher-friends-who-haven't-had-a-raise-in-ages-and-pay-for-their-own-pencils,  family near and far.  This is what friends do.....

Celebrating Businesses!  Our adoption coordinator is beyond description.  Rare to find someone who will laugh, cry, pray, and dance with you - AND efficiently process hundreds of documents at all hours of the night. Our workplaces are flexing for childcare leave, the doctors and dentists and eye doctors give discounts and rewrite forms over and over and over to perfection.  This is above and beyond "business as usual"....

Celebrating Strangers!  There are some puzzle pieces that have question marks on them.  These represent people who have given - and we don't know their names.  Either donations were anonymous or they were passing through - like the lady at the yard sale who didn't want to buy anything.  She just wanted to help.  Strangers acting strangely....

So, you see the math lesson here?  If the puzzle represents a whole, the pieces are fractions.  A boy's heart and our family are that whole.  All of those we are celebrating today are the fractional bits without which the heart and the family are incomplete.  Adoption math is different than regular old school math - it includes widows and orphans and mites and giving beyond what you have.  Sometimes it doesn't add up on paper.  I can't work these figures out neatly and prove the result.  I just know that the pieces will add up to love and healing in the end.

A Twist on the Lorax by Dr. Seuss

The Once-ler: Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing's going to get better. It's not.


This was read to our students at school today in the book, The Lorax, by Dr. Seuss for Read Across America Day.  Now, in the book, the point is referring to the environmental crisis taking place around the characters.  But I was struck by this quote and how it fits how I feel about the orphan crisis right now.  I suppose it fits any crisis but I can only speak to what I know and believe and understand - where my heart is right now....


*I know that there are so many, many kids who are in desperate need of a family - in America and all around the world.


*I know that getting those children into a family is not likely to happen without the help of a LOT of other people and funds because there are not enough "rich" folk to equal the number of kids in need.


*I know that this isn't going to get better by talking or studying the problem - someone (you, me) must care a whole awful lot.  When you care a lot, you will do and give whatever it takes.  You care more than you fear.  And, slowly, one life at a time, things DO change.


*I know that a young man in Latvia just sent me a message begging us to come faster for him because he doesn't like it there.  Honey, I'd be there tomorrow if not for the system.  He NEEDS us to care an awful lot.  And he is not alone.  


*I know that not all can or should adopt.  I also know that many more could or could help those who do.  


So...on this Dr. Seuss celebration day I just ask - are you open to caring a whole awful lot?  For just one child?  Host him.  Adopt her.  Give to those who are trying to.  And for those who do/are - BLESS YOU!